Home is where the heart is

As I was contemplating what to write about next while I had stepped out to get a breath of air, I came across a hoarding which said that the person in the picture was from Punjab and not from Mumbai. I then seemed to recall two other similar hoardings on my way home from the airport just a couple of days before.

The content was similar: one with a white man saying he was from Canada and not from Mumbai and another with a lady in a traditional Bengali sari, stating the obvious -that she was from Bengal - not Mumbai.

While of course I wondered what the hoardings were trying to say, one cannot help but acknowledge that cities are the hub where people from all over came in search of livelihood, prospects and dream fulfillment and while many stay on for years not all come to make it their home.

Then again, do the people born and brought up in these big cities feel at home here?! What is it that is slowly but surely alienating us (especially as we grow older) from the metropolises?

The crowds, the traffic, the noise and pollution are contributing factors but for many - even if they don’t realize it – it is fatigue. They are in a race, without wanting to be a part of it and tired of it but don’t know their way out.

Yet they hardly ever take the time to reconnect with themselves and their heart’s true longings. After spending long hours at work and commuting and the weekends meeting demands on their time from family, friends and social obligations not much remains for silent self contemplation.

Reconnecting with self even for a few moments everyday could lead one home. After all home is where the heart is and if we take the time to truly figure out where our heart belongs we could lead richer lives.

It could be in simple pleasures like a walk on the beach as you feel the sand under your feet or watching the stars as you fall sleep in a tent on a mountaintop camping over a weekend, or doing something you enjoy and which is something just for yourself (even if it may seem selfish).

It is the little pleasures of life that will help you cope with the race and who knows maybe help you get away from it. Look around and you will come across examples of individuals who have successfully gotten away from the race and are leading successful and HAPPY personal as well as professional lives.

Return to innocence

Recently while going through her things, my mother-in-law came across a picture of my husband as a baby. It was a stamp sized picture in black and white but cute none the less. That evening when my husband returned from work I told him about it and he promptly asked me if I had seen the other picture. When I said no he immediately removed from the cupboard two large pictures framed in cardboard to show me.

One was the same as the stamp sized picture while I had cooed over in the afternoon. But the second one just took my heart away. It was that of a baby holding a red plastic ball and gurgling over it. What I forgot to mention was that the first picture had the baby pointing at something and smiling.

What struck me about the two pictures was that while in one the baby pointed at an object, a plastic ball, in the very next picture the baby was happily playing with the ball that had been the object of its attention. All it took to make it happy was a simple plastic ball. The picture always puts a smile on my face too.

We have all seen at one time or another how little it takes to make children happy. They find joy in the smallest of things. And yet as we grow up to be adults we forget this very basic of life - to take joy in the small things of life because that is what life is made up of – the small stuff.

What we require to is a return to innocence in this age of materialism and competition. We have to re-learn how to have fun. You will be surprised how young it will make you feel. Not only that, it will also help you at work - teach you how to think out-of-the-box.

Ever noticed how a child finds numerous uses for any given object?! As a child, I am sure you used a book not only to read but also as a pillow or a tent for your miniature toys and make belief games besides using the paper to make boats, planes or even money and paper bombs that actually go pop.

But a return to innocence does not just signify this. A movie I recently saw had 4 kids as the protagonists. 3 of the kids are very young and 1 in his teens. When they lose their parents in an accident their charge is given to the young man responsible for the same (as retribution). And while he makes all efforts to make the children feel comfortable and loved, the children - at first - find it difficult to come to terms with the change in their lives.

Yet as the movie progresses he is able to befriend the 3 younger children easier that the teen. They are more forgiving and open to LOVE than the teen who does not want to let go of his feeling of anger towards the young man.

This is so true for adults. As we grow older we prefer to hold on to our negative feeling more than the positive ones. We let fear, anger, hurt, revenge and one-upmanship rule our lives instead of LOVE, peace, joy, forgiveness and sharing.

When we re-learn these virtues (which are habits to us as children), will be able to lead fulfilled lives. When we live without fear, treat each day as an adventure from which we can learn to love life, people and what we do – it will be a true return to innocence.

What's in a name ?!

So what's in a name: as Shakespeare said, 'A rose by any other name would smell just as sweet'.

Well, my father was of a different opinion. To him how he named his children did not only signify his hope of what his children would grow up to be. He named us all so that everytime someone called out to us, spoke a holy name and thus earned some points with the BIG GUY up in heaven :-).

Of course he was oblivious to the fact that as time progressed; the names would be abbreviated by both family and friends, even us - to make them sound like we were in sync with times. However, we do hope we have made him proud in some way even if small by achieving his original objective in naming us the way he did.

Did you know that in France, calendars dedicate each day to a saint? And parents for the most part name their children selecting from variations of these names?!

Of course while the above methods seem simple, when choosing a name for a baby today we refer to numerous books, the internet or even the stars in the hope to find something unique and pleasing at the same time. However, just remember – a rose by another name may not grow into a rose after all.

About life

This one is just to get the juices (creative or not - not yet sure). Since it is my first effort at trying to publish my writings, what topic could be better than everyday life.

As a soon to be mother currently on vacation I often have some time on my hands to wonder what life is all about ? What is it that the little one hopes to achieve with his / her life once s/he is born and more importantly, will s/he remember this life's mission ?

What was it I came here for ? I certainly don't seem to remember and only hope that I am on the right track so far. As a person (though i may not be qualified to speak for myself), I believe I am a good person. Professionally, I have always been confused about what I wanted so far.

Having started working almost immediately after college, there were many things I wanted to try my hand at but given the conventional background at home where the way of thinking encouraged us to find and keep a steady job, did not permit the pursuit of hobbies except reading - which I am always grateful - was nurtured from childhood.

However, as a friend once put it, it better to be content than to be happy (here we look at BEING HAPPY as the glass being half full), this way we always have something to look forward to. Something to add to the glass. And that is how I have been looking at life.

While we all are given limited time on earth, if we have things to look forward to and to pursue, - besides the growing up of our children and fulfillment of their dreams - like hobbies and personal childhood dreams we may have had, we can enjoy a much fuller life.

Am sure you would have come across people, even within your family, who feel that life has led them to a deadend as soon as they touch retirement age. With no professional life to look forward to or once the children have grown up and started their personal life projects - many a times excluding their parents, the road ahead seems lonely and listless.

If we look back upon our childhood and our youth from time to time, we WILL come across dreams we had which may now seem silly / childish or even unpursuable like learning to play a musical instrument or a new language or even being on radio. It would be worth the effort to give them a shot. You never know what you may achieve through them.

Besides the fact that you will be able to say you did follow up on them you will have had the opportunity to make new aquaintences and through them learn more ABOUT LIFE.

While all that goes on in our life as we go from one adventure to another from childhood to the moment of reckoning is something to consider, there are times - times when I am calm with nothing to preoccupy my mind - when I wonder about the ORIGINAL PURPOSE of my life.

I may be far from the answer or very close. All I know that the answer is simple and I am getting warm :-).